SHAKING OFF THE DUST

Hello World!!!! I'm back! Things have been a little off for me over the last...year...

Personally - things are good. My job is OK. My marriage is good. My kids are holy fricken terrors, but that's normal...for us anyway. I haven't had a lot to say, so I've been quiet. I've had a LOT on my mind - but haven't been able to find the words...or at least not repetitive words.

I don't want to go on and on about Ryan and our struggles, but things have gotten so much worse! He's in 6th grade this year and he's changing classes for the first time. He started school in August and at the open house when I got his schedule I almost fainted...they put my son in an ADVANCED Math class!!! WTF?!?!?!?!

I was a little worried about this, but I talked to his teacher and she said that they'd be going at a slow pace and he could stop her at anytime...the first week of school, he came home and had 4 HOURS of homework...ALL in Math! He said he could do it, so I let him try.

The first semester was GREAT!!! He made the A/B Honor Roll! The second week of the 2nd semester, he told me he just couldn't do it any more. Advanced Math was TOO hard! As you know, he was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome about a year and a half ago. He was also diagnosed with ADHD (but the INattentive part), so the doc put him on some meds. This helped him in his 5th grade year PASS the FCAT (which i TOTALLY HATE, BTW), but in doing that it also showed the district that he's smart, so they put him in the Advanced Math class and his head almost exploded!

The thing Ry's teachers know about him is that he wants EVERYTHING to be perfect, what Ry doesn't understand is that NOTHING is perfect! Its OK to make mistakes - you LEARN from them. But with the way his brain is wired, his thinking is different. He thinks he HAS to be perfect or he won't be loved or liked. His teachers LOVE him! He is SO smart and SO sweet and he tries SO hard.

Last week, I got 4 phone calls in 4 days...his guidance counselor and his teacher. Apparently he's been having 'episodes' where he'll get something wrong and he'll knock himself upside the head or (and THIS was a doozy) he'll hit himself upside the head with a dictionary...REALLY?!?!?! You couldn't find a SPOT CAN RUN book?!

I'm at my wits end! I don't know what to do! I've tried showing him things he can do to calm himself (his guidance counselor helped), but it doesn't seem to work! I mean, it will for that one instance, but long term? I've tried explaining to Ry that when he hits himself or gets upset about something, he's scaring the people around him and causing the teacher to not be able to teach the OTHER students...

I don't want 'specialized treatment' for him, I want HIM to GET it! There is a down side to all of this...he doesn't remember having the episodes a day or two later...or he'll remember he got upset, but doesn't remember why or what he did! I have a re-evaluation appointment set up for him with the Psychologist on March 26th...